Tag Archives: soul

‘Twas a Dark Night of The Soul

2012 was a hard year for me.

I was going nuts going through an excruciating dark night of the soul… I had no idea what was happening to me. Friends and family did not know what to do with me. It was such a scary, isolating, mind boggling, debilitating dark time of my life. An experience I wouldn’t wish on anybody.

It was around this time, 12/21/12 when I enrolled to become an Awakening Coach. And then later, a Robbins Madanes Coach… searching high and low for answers… for truth. 

There was so much I had to learn on my own to reconcile within me… so much to un-layer, dismantle and expose… so much numbness I had to thaw out… so much I had to feel again or allow to feel for the first time… so much I had to reframe and rewire… release, let go and surrender… so much, so much, so much rebellion… revolution… inside of me… to go against the grain and de-program and de-condition who I thought I was… let go of the box of limitation I was forced into… and continued to create for myself… and finally have the courage to step out of the box to fully recognize and re-member the deep calling of my Soul to become flesh! 

In each reprieve, in each “oh my god” awakening moments, my prayer was:

May I feel this Awake, this Alive, this Audacious

And with every breath, with every thought, with every moment, I made it my living, embodied prayer, until memories of those anguished moments transcended and transmuted into such gloriousness they take my breath away in awe of God’s amazingness that we are. No longer buying into separation. Learning instead every bit of AT-ONE-MENT.

Simply: I AM. Oneness. Wholeness. Fullness.

And I am so grateful for all of it. The wild, heart-ripping, mind-boggling emotional rollercoaster. The mind, oh I love you so. And most especially the stubbornness of my soul that refused to yield to what was out of alignment and was robbing me of joy and power.

No more.

No more to whomever/whatever insults my/our Soul.

I do not apologize nor can ever regret kicking out of my path those who pushed/dragged/weighed me down. The gift isn’t lost on me. Thank you for triggering me to get the hell out of man-made, egoic, fear-based kind of existence. Thank you for evicting me out of there. I never did belong there. And now I hold space for you to join me here. In glorious heaven.

Heaven is where we all belong. And isn’t this such an exciting time to be alive!!!!!!! Divine, glorious, humans!!! Restoring our divinity, our true infinite potentialities and possibilities.

And today on 12.21.19, I truly feel and know and sense with every fiber of my being, this is where we are NOW.

Thy Kingdom Come On Earth As It Is In Heaven.

NOW.

2020! I am so excited you are. I know I am barely scratching the surface. And whereas in the past, I prayed to “get me out of here”, I now can’t wait to Explore, Experience, Expand. I can’t wait to play with you and all of creation!!!

Let’s go!

Join me? Email me at tess@tessvergara.com to find out how to get Soul Powered in 2020 and reclaim your heaven, your joy, your power NOW.